First Fight
acrylic painting: 26” x 25” $ 425
Parents occasionally fight but when violence, exacerbated by drugs and alcohol, is the norm, children are bound to suffer.
An Adrenalin Rush
Ray and I have been mentoring a youth who between the age of 16 and 19 had lived on the streets. Though his journey was wrought with a great many highs and lows, over the past four years he transformed himself into an industrial painter with a career that promises a good life. His experiences made me curious about why some homeless youth metamorphose while most do not. To learn more I read a great many studies and interviewed numerous adults engaged with this population. I am now drawing conclusions that I would like to share with the hope that you will provide me with your experiences and thoughts.
Teens leave their homes for a myriad of ugly reasons, most often involving poverty. Their Households might be violent, unsafe places with parents addicted to drugs, alcohol or illegal ventures. Or… they may have been kicked out due to their sexual orientation or their own involvement with prostitution, drugs robbery, gangs or truancy. Over forty percent have severe mental problems. Whatever the cause, once they leave school they are on a downward slope that continues to snowball in hopelessness. Each year, Portland agencies provide intervention to1000 children. Nationally according to Safe Horizons there are over 1.7 million on the streets.
My biggest surprise was discovering that life on the streets can be a lot of fun. Homelessness is often a relief from stressful situations and presents interesting experiences. I am reminded of ancient Indian rites of passage that sent youth into the wilderness on a vision quest, to hunt and discover that they can subsist on their own.
Modern day wanderers learn very quickly how easy it is to survive. They discover where to get three meals a day and how to find shelter for the night. They couch-surf or visit crisis centers in bad weather. There are known hang-out parks where 40-50 youth gather to smoke, play a brutal form of dodge-ball, competitive chess and to skate board. In the wee hours of the morning, one of the older kids might shout to the others, “You can crash at my place for the night.” Ten to fifteen teens might follow, listening to music and partaking in drugs before drifting to sleep on chairs, sofas and floor. Unfocused on consequences, the apartment dweller will often get evicted due to complaints.
To live on the streets takes constant vigilance and awareness of danger. Yet it is intriguing to watch illicit money change hands and to figure out how to avoid becoming the target of violence. Street life certainly beats going to boring school lectures while sitting still for hours at a time. And no homework . . . ah, the taste of freedom is addictive. There is no one to tell you to clean your room, when to be home and with whom to hang.
Gang Leader for a Day, is a book about the HUD housing projects of Chicago. The author, Sudhir Venkatesh, described how men joined gangs when young, rising in rank to become wealthy drug lords. Many of these bosses had the resources to move their mothers out of their decrepit buildings and into suburbia only to find that their moms preferred living in their old apartments. The women felt isolated in their new homes and missed the friendships that were formed with others who shared similar adversity. Families helped each other with food and babysitting, providing shelter when needed along with a listening ear. They bartered, threatened, bribed, hid drugs, paid protection money, strong armed and prostituted officials in order to survive. When there was a shooting, gang families in each housing unit formed a closely knit cocoon to fight their enemy. There was never a dull moment. Adrenaline ran high.
Homeless youth often become part of street families that protect their members from threats. From them they learn how to steal, beg and acquire drugs. Young girls are lured by pimps with the promise of love and become controlled through drug addiction. Attractive women can earn over $1000 a day being paired with well heeled businessmen or politicians. Why would these girls want to return to school or minimum wage jobs?
Street kids rarely understand that actions have consequences. Their role models were parents who lived from one pay or SSI check to the next with no thought of the future. Their families avoided banking, preferring to hide cash under mattresses or in holes dug in walls. On July 4th, in one of the poorest parts of Kelso, Washington I watched residents explode thousands of dollars in fireworks.
Middle class youth are monitored and continuously coached by caring adults. They are offered adventures through hiking and camping excursions, and given opportunities for thrills by rock climbing, horseback riding, snow boarding, water skiing and taking dune buggy rides.
Runaways seek similar excitement and quickly become addicted to street life. They too crave adrenaline producing ventures that test their survival skills. Though they are dropouts without a safety valve, they still want to participate in dramatic exploits. To entice them back into the classroom, educators need to provide adrenaline producing, hands-on training programs. These experiences need to be administered with a tough love approach that gives frequent rewards (food treats, housing, clothing, electronics) for progress and non-violent punishments (pushups, jogging, cleaning) for mishaps.
Why do some kids graduate from this addictive lifestyle to become contributing tax payers? The more intelligent youth get bored with standing in lines to eat and sleep. The minute they recognize that their life is floundering is the moment that intervention has a chance to work. Job Corps, Outside In, New Avenues for Youth and Janus Youth Services have programs in Portland that reach out to kids before they are indoctrinated in street behavior. These agencies place them in transitional housing and work to get them back in school. Unfortunately, funding is limited for the long term counseling required for indoctrination into a middle class values.
These children need to learn basic lessons in self-care. They must to be taught how to purchase food, set a table, clean an apartment, study for exams, manage their money, and get along with others. They have to learn about bank accounts, personal hygiene, who to trust, how to complete applications, what job opportunities are possible and where to get training. They need to be taught to drive a car, how to dress for work, and what type of body piercings and tattoos are inappropriate. These, skills routinely taught by middle class parents are alien to those who have not had parental guidance.
The child Ray and I befriended is successful in part because we recognized that he was not afraid of heights. He was fearless when asked to help clean the roof. A career as an industrial painter was the perfect solution for him. High bridges and water towers keep his adrenaline flowing. No longer is life boring, nor is there a need to escape with drugs.
I believe that children who experienced parental love when young have a better chance of surviving a crisis during their teens. Even if they experienced violence or addiction they still feel valued by their parents. An insight came from a friend of mine who at one time lived next door to a dysfunctional household. My friend had a large garden and invited his neighbor-children to help plant and weed in the spring and harvest vegetables to take home in the fall. . . . Fast forward eleven years when of the girls was heard talking to her brother. “Do you remember when Dad had that garden and we all worked in it together?” Her sibling laughed in response by reminding her that their father was an alcoholic. “Don’t you remember that it was the neighbor’s garden?” he asked. The girl had wanted so much to believe that her father was a loving family man that she transferred her neighbor’s actions to her own parent. Children cling to good childhood memories and creatively make up new ones when needed, expanding them to fill voids. According to Kevin Donegan from Janus Youth Services, “Every youth wants to believe that he or she is desired. During holidays they all wish they could go home.”
The topic of youth homelessness is huge and I have only skirted a few issues. Drugs, alcohol, transgender and mental difficulties present their own challenges that need to be dealt with in individualized ways. Government statistics skim the surface and do not tell how to treat the problem. I am writing a book on the subject which is why I look forward to your comments.
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Art Work is always for sale. Contact me at marilynne@eichingerfineart.com or go to eichingerfineart.com for more information.
References:
http://www.safehorizon.org/page/homeless-youth-statistics–facts-69.html – Homeless Youth Statistics.
Gang Leader for a Day by Sudhir Venkatesh: About the Chicago housing projects and gang life.
Information gained from my own experiences as well as interviews with Keven Donegon, from Janus Youth Services, Kathy Oliver from Outside Inn, and Dewey Taylor a Job Corps trainer.